Early this morning we started something new. Completely fed up with fighting the boys on EVERY little request, I decided that their response should now be "OK, Mom" or "OK, Dad"--no "buts" allowed. (I know I shouldn't be so hard on them. Asking them to put their clothes on after a bath really is SO unreasonable.) To my relief, both of them immediately started practicing and it was working really well--until Landen left for school.
Nathan is on his best behavior when he is trying to upstage his big brother. When Landen is in trouble or not listening, Nathan uses that as his time to shine as the "good son." Unfortunately this motivation boarded a mini bus at 7:10am and Nathan has since been sitting at the kitchen table refusing to drink one swallow of milk. He's screamed, kicked, tried to leave the table, and even passed up feeding cows with daddy.
I find these all-to-frequent battle of wills the most exhausting part of parenting. I can see why so many parents simply give in to their children for the sake of peace. But, I know that temporary peace is not what will ultimately win the war. I have seen what happens to young adults who were allowed to win these battles when they were young. I can spot which of them were allowed to quit when life got tough. They turn into frustrated young adults with no respect for anyone in authority. They want to accomplish great things, but are not equipped to handle adversity. These young adults do not realize that authority does not disappear after high school graduation. This is very unfortunate.
Although we are NOT perfect parents, David and I strive to give our children more than that. By "more" we do not mean excessive material possessions or more freedom than they are able to handle. This desire to give our children the best possible tools for life is what keeps us pressing on toward the goal--battle after battle
The Battle of Warm Milk has now lasted nearly 2 hours. I will need another cup of coffee for reinforcement as the battle rages on.
I love it. we go through the same thing with Spencer. he fusses and has a melt down and we ignore him while he sits under the table babbling to him self. he is probably saying what bad parents we are under his breath but oh well. he is usually a great eater and we hardly have any meltdowns but when they happen, i can't help but giggle. he is just like me stubborn as hell. i hope th battle of warm milk has subsided and you can more onto the next test in parenting.
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