Subconscious Guilt

A good friend of mine is a freelance writer and also writes a blog called "Parenting by Trial and Error." She recently wrote an entry on playing with your children and if it is really necessary. As I was reading it, I noticed just how much of my life I spend feeling guilty without even realizing it!

I feel guilty for not playing with my kids enough.
I feel guilty when I need to ask someone to watch my kids.
I feel guilty when they are happy watching a movie or tv show (even if it is educational).
I feel guilty if I am doing something I enjoy (i.e. Facebook or knitting) while I have a quiet moment.
I feel guilty if they have been playing downstairs for awhile and I haven't checked on them. (Even though that's what I WANT them to do!)
I feel guilty if I am too tired to talk much when David comes in the house.
Pretty much if you can name it--I have felt guilty about it.

Like I said--it was so much a part of my life, I didn't even realize I was doing it!
Now I am really trying to make a conscious effort to just stop the guilt. The only person it hurts is me. Everyone else seems pretty happy around here--when they're not beating up on each other, that is.
I am not a big player with my kids. I enjoy reading to them (surprise, surprise) and working with them--baking with them for example. I do play occasionally, but I would rather they entertain each other while I get my other work done around the house.
Maybe I feel I should play with them more because my mom spent so much time playing with me. (I really am thankful, Mom!!) But, then I have to realize that I was an only child for almost 7 years. On the other hand, my mother in law who had 4 children in about 6 years says she "never" played with her children--except to read, of course. She told them that's why she had so many kids so close together! When she told me that before I had children I thought that was pretty harsh, but now I know exactly what she meant. I have told Landen several times, "That's why God gave you a little brother." That is usually answered with, "But I don't want a brother!" Which, of course, I answer with, "Tough."
It is now time to get back to my mommy work--before I start to feel guilty again!

Even trade?

Did I say a few weeks ago I wouldn't trade my boys for anything? Well, lately I have been thinking a pet tortoise might be a reasonable trade. A tortoise would be quiet & slow moving, which would eliminate the running and screaming so prevalent in our home. They are docile creatures (no fighting)! A tortoise would also eat my grass, which would help with the summer mowing. I'm pretty sure it wouldn't pee around my toilet and some species even hibernate! Yes, I think 2 boys for a tortoise would be a good trade. Let me know if you know of any zoos looking for two crazy monkeys!

Gurney's Catalog

I knew it was coming. I just didn't know when. I tried to resist, but it is too late now. I opened my mailbox and it was all over.
I have seen the promised summer to come. It is a summer filled with a zillion varieties of green beans and zinnias and purple carrots and cauliflower that looks like cheddar cheese and kohlrabi (whatever that is). Oh, yes--and there's more! Dripping yellow pears and bright red apples and ornamental peppers that look like Christmas lights will abound! Cilantro and parsley will live in harmony. Gardens will produce pumpkins large enough to hold a small child--or two! It is destined to be a beautiful summer until . . .
The weeds outgrow my plants and I cannot tell which to pull.
Bean leaf beetles not only attack our fields, but my tiny green bean plants as well.
I see a snake and decide to take a few weeks off from gardening.
We have a few windy 110 degree days.
I realize that the only time I can be in the garden is when the mosquitoes are at their worst.
My dog eats the strawberries.
The lawn mower gets a little too close to the onion plants.
I swear I will never plant a garden again.

But--I have hope. I have seen the Gurney's Catalog, and I will plant on! I will have a beautiful, bountiful garden this year--for two or three days at least.

Edges

I always like to look through the catalogs that arrive in my mailbox, even though I rarely order from them. One item I have seen recently is a brownie pan that is either zig-zagged or has three seperate rectangles. This is to make sure every person's brownie has chewy edges. Are chewy brownie edges really that high in demand? I am a middle of the pan girl myself. Maybe I am in the minority. What is your favorite region of a pan of brownies?

Why I Love Sundays

1. Going to church
2. Coffee & conversation with the Cresbard ladies
3. Clean, dressed-up kids
4. Sunday dinner--especially if I don't have to cook it!
5. NAPS
6. Time as a family (Although, I am afraid that has ended for awhile as we have baby calves arriving left and right!)
7. Guilt-free laziness
8. Popcorn for supper
9. America's Funniest Home Videos at 6pm (my boys' FAVORITE)
10. "Desperate Housewives" with a bowl of ice cream after the kids are in bed

Happy Sunday!